Flippin Clippers

Posted on September 12, 2011 by attraversiamodarmaz

grrrrrr…
Is a haircut really such a big deal?
yes.
I KNOW!
It’s just…we get to this point where it is TOTALLY time to either trim or braid or something.
They HATE combing/brushing…anything.
ok.
I get it.
I retired the clippers to Kirby.
The first cut was $7.
I gave a nice tip because he spent a long time on their hairs.
They looked GOOOD!
Next time I went back the cut was $14.
No big deal…still looked good.
Last time we went there it was over $20 and that was it.
Time to dust of my clippers.
I have a little one (really nice to maneuver) with a wide variety of guards.
Then there is this big fella…only two guards. REEEEAAALLLY long or REALLLLLY short.
BB does not like haircuts…never has.
MC doesn’t mind…but he is VERY particular.
Then he has to get used to it for a few days.
Today was haircut day. I let them choose trim or cut.
BB wasn’t too bad, but the clippers were acting sort of funny.
The little ones weren’t really cutting, and the big one was either too short or too long.
We trimmed up BB with the too long but he looks good.
Then it’s time for MC.
Sometimes he goes with a mohawk, but that needs to be on a Friday night so he forgets about it by Monday morning…too silly at school.
I’m thinking a fade might do the trick.
I start working on his hair…I bet I switched guards and clippers no less than 10 times!!!
Nothing was working!
I even used a comb and was going to cut with NO guard (brave, aren’t I?).
I went to Sally to get either different guard sizes for the big one or a new blade for the smaller one (NO I didn’t bring the clippers with me…I guessed – wrong).
It took FOREVER and MC and I were both over it.
I had to finish though.
A little here, a little there…free hand to blend it just right on top and smooth it all out.
It might be the best haircut I have ever given him.
I’m worn out!
He’s happy.
We’re good.

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30 Mirrors

Posted on August 27, 2011 by attraversiamodarmaz

I have 30 mirrors in my home.
This does include one in the garage, but it is hung. This does not include my creative inventory.
I only realized this when we had our cleaning party last weekend.
I was cleaning mirrors after children had cleaned mirrors;)
I started counting and was a bit taken aback.
Then I started thinking about my life the past few years…
How things are drawn to a person…
How who you are and what you are about seems to surface both literally and figuratively.
In an introduction to some journaling time at work I shared this…my 30 mirrors.
They might have categorized this as one of my randoms thoughts pulled from the air.
You cannot force reflection…being reflective.
I can ask you to look at yourself…30 times.
It does not mean you will see…or even truly look.
Having 30 mirrors does not give me reflective children, or even children who truly see their beauty.
If it is possible to be too reflective, I am.
Perhaps my mirrors were to bring light to behavior in my house that wasn’t working.
I’m not sure the mirrors were what changed things.
I like the idea of the symbol of a mirror…the meaning and possibility.
Father Greg Boyle quoted Mother Theresa when he said, “we forgot that we belong to one another.”
He went on to say that we are called to reside at the perimeter. Invite others in. He says serving others is the hallway to the grand ballroom of kinship. We should show up, hold a mirror up so that we might help one another remember who we are and why we are here.
I like that…very much.

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I’m Concerned

Posted on August 16, 2011 by attraversiamodarmaz

How often does a problem go unnoticed until it invades our personal world…our comfort zone? A lot I suppose.
My world has been full of young people and urban education and democracy and social justice for many many years.
This moment is when my own personal safety is called into question as a mom.
I have been all over Houston…once even to pull a student out of a potential gang stand off. I remember wondering as we drove if I should have the window up to slow a bullet or down so I could hear it coming. These are the moments I look back on and just shake my head. I wasn’t a mom. I was only responsible for me (I use that word loosely, clearly).
In Kansas City I would go all over town at all times of day…picking students up…dropping them off. I wasn’t a mom. I was only responsible for me.
When I happened to catch the story about concerns of violence on the Plaza, this caught my attention. That is 5 minutes from my house. 5 minutes from where my babies sleep.
My friend asked if I wanted to go to the Plaza art fair. I said sure! but wait…
If this is my response…then it is time that I put in one place all I know and have read that just might impact this situation.
I heard on the news they were talking about imposing a 9pm curfew. I think they did this in Westport when there were issues with violence. Kids just find somewhere else to go. A curfew does not send people home…just away. Away would assume they have somewhere to go…something to do…or implies perhaps we do not care if they have somewhere to go or something to do…just don’t be here. Go and “be” somewhere else. I don’t like that message. Neither do kids.
I don’t know who it is hanging around on the Plaza. I do know that I used to hang around when I was in high school. I wasted a lot of gas driving around and up and down Welch Avenue. There was nowhere to “be”…nowhere that reached out to me…that captured my interest. I had a home to go to…loving parents…family…friends. I wanted to socialize and hang out.
When I moved to Houston in 1995, one of the first places I felt comfort was at the community center near one of my schools. There was always something going on there and lots of families and friendly people about. It was a place to be with things to do.
I do not know where my points of reference fit into this situation, but it seems one or more may be pertinent.
This is what I am wondering:
1. Who is hanging around creating a problem?
2. What do they like to do?
3. Do they have a job?
4. Are they in school?
5. What do they think might be some solutions to this situation?
6. Did this situation migrate from Westport? If so, how can we handle things this time in a better way?
Here are the things I was thinking in connection to this situation:
I don’t even remember what was going on with the economy when I was “hanging out” but I did have a job and was in school. Is the economy and a lack of money for social activities a factor? Or is it that there isn’t somewhere to be to begin with?
When the hanging out involves gun violence this results in death or at the very least a probably costly and inconvenient recovery for someone that would be nice to avoid. It also might involves the cost of incarceration which I think runs at about $60,000 a year.
I started searching for information on big cities with low crime. I wondered about what they were doing that we may or may not be doing.
I thought of Airick Leonard West and was interested in his insight on the situation.
I wondered what Father Greg Boyle might suggest we do. It isn’t gang violence, but his capacity to connect and care and listen is just the thing.
I was brought to tears by Jeremy Gilley as he shared about his one day of peace and what he was collectively able to accomplish.
No one comes into the world wanting to create a problem or bring harm to others. How did we get to here? Since we are here, where might we go so there are plenty of places to be and things to do?
I wonder…

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The Pantry

Posted on August 8, 2011 by attraversiamodarmaz

Ideas simmer and roll around in my head for a long time before they come to pass.
What might look like an impulsive project explosion has actually already been finely executely from start to finish in my head many times over.
Sometimes I look for ideas and think and don’t know what “finished” looks like until I get there.
This time, I have been thinking about my pantry and browsing on Pinterest and dreading the excavation required to even see the back of that space to overhaul it. It is a project with layers of purpose:
1. It was really gross and needed a fresh coat of paint.
2. The shelves were bare wood.
3. The remains of many organizational overhauls needed to be tended.
4. It feels like the hub of our home…if we can think through this space, the rest of the organization will follow from this place.
5. It needs to be arranged for children who are able to do much in the kitchen.
6. We need to think through what we nourish ourselves with…really (instead of grand plans waiting to expire).
7. From this place we live purposefully, aware and together.
8. I want it to be pretty, and blue, with lighting.
The end of the summer might not have been the best time…but I wonder if there is a good time to explode a pantry all over the kitchen and dining room and paint and add shelving and lighting and reorganize in an amazing way with my A Team. The time is now. We must. Another school year is upon us. If I wait, it will be BB’s graduation from high school and who wants to do all this with no comedians around? I told BB I MUST finish the pantry. He told me with his two fingers gestured from his eyes to mine, that he had his eyes on me if I thought about slacking off;)
So, with pantry all around me while the paint grudgingly dries…I am working on my pretty light fixture. It is just for us. Not many others will see it I imagine. Maybe that is another reason I want to do this…sharing my message for my comedians with actions…lighting up the dark corners of this world one little sparkle at a time.

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Where we lay it down

Posted on August 3, 2011 by attraversiamodarmaz

We meet again!
I find it interesting that I did not meet my once a month blog post pattern for May, June, and July.
I enjoy Facebook. I notice that people use it in a variety of ways. Many catalog the ins and outs of their day. Some share inspiration, political beliefs, political disbelief, worries, prayer requests, recipes, photos, photos, photos. Did I mention photos? I think I share a bit of all of that, though I avoid politics for the most part. There are unwritten rules as well as written ones I suppose. Tweeting is probably more for the moment to moment sharing of your life. Blogs are probably appropriate for anecdotes. I realize I quite intentionally ignore rules and tidy organization. I mix it all up. I think I have been blogging on Facebook and when I am told (gently) that my status update is too long, they will kindly edit and turn it into a note. Perfect. My family and friends are spread all over the place. I love the sharing of photos to have a window in and feel some sense of connectedness. My Project 365 is merely “housed” on Facebook in my albums. I really like sharing my grateful post each day. I am nearly done with turning my first Project 358 into a photobook. I cannot wait to hold it and flip through the year of gratitude.
I cannot forget the helpful resources I find on Facebook. I have saved a lot wading through all of the coupon bloggers who search out deals for me. I also learn and grow as a parent and educator for social justice as I follow organizations of like minded individuals.
It seems I have been resting my thoughts on Facebook conveniently. I have a tale or two I have been saving for here.
I think it is time to write again.
It might just be me and mama reading…that works:)
The joy is in the writing. The point, I guess, is that we lay it down somewhere.
I am reading Word After Word After Word by Patricia MacLaughlan. I LOVE the way she shares in this story about why people write.
Henry asks Ms. Mirabel, an author visiting their 4th grade class a key question she answers beautifully:
“And then Hen asked the question that made all the difference to us.
“Why do you write?” he asked.
Ms. Mirabel sighed. There was a sudden hush in the room, as if Ms. Mirabel was about to say something very important.
As it turned out, she was.
“I, myself, write to change my life, to make it come out the way I want it to,” she said. “But other people write for other reasons: to see more closely what it is they are thinking about, what they may be afraid of. Sometimes writers write to solve a problem, to answer their own question. All these reasons are good reasons. And that is the most important thing I’ll ever tell you. Maybe it is the most important thing you’ll ever hear. Ever.” ”
*sigh*
Exactly.

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The A Team is Hi to the Larious

Posted on March 20, 2011 by attraversiamodarmaz

MC was looking quite serious at a corner, so I inquired.
He said he wasn’t mad or sad and he didn’t have any questions.
I looked and waited and I am SO glad I did.
Here is what he said: “I have a lot of whys Mom.”
I wasn’t sure if he meant a lot of wise, or a lot of whys…so I asked him to tell me about that.
He spit out the list in such a way that it was clear they were causing a traffic jam in his control center.
“why are those tires like that? (fancy sporty wheels) Why is the six on the gas sign hanging crooked like that?? Why does that car have a rhinoceros on it…I see it all the time…why the rhinoceros??”
I smiled and talked about possibilites and told him how really glad I was he shared his whys. Further, that I really adore the way his mind works.

WOW.

THEN…

BB and CNN and I are on the way to the store and they are talking drama and intrigue and mystery and plots of epic proportions.
They say they hate Cody Henderson.
I say that isn’t very nice.
They say it is just a doll, well not a doll, a raisin…well, we SAY he is a raisin.
THEN they tell me the deal.
Cody Henderson is horrible. He jumps into people’s cereal and they try to eat him but he is poison and so they spit him out. He tastes terrible and his nose is really hairy. He runs away after he is spit out…no he hops away because he has no legs.
I tried to keep with their story. I said, “Let me get this straight, Cody Henderson is a raisin like person with a hairy nose who is horrible and hides in cereal?”
They said, “Yes Mom, and he is from Mexico…he told us that.”
Ahhh.

They went on with their make believe world wherein one character asked another, “Is your dad from China?” The character said (CNN), “Yes, his name is Patterson.”
They couldn’t figure out what I thought was so funny.
Hi to the Larious.

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A thought in January

Posted on February 5, 2011 by attraversiamodarmaz

How sad.
Thoughts and feelings can be so concrete sometimes.
Restrictions.
Rules.
Boundaries.
Guidelines.
We find ourselves pacing in a cell.
Damning a lack of air, freedom, choice, opportunity.
The great tragedy is…
When we awake in this awful place we so condemn
Only to realize
We are the creator.
This prison is designed, maintained, and at times even given tenure-like security.
All by the power of our thought.

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How to manage that mouth AND have fun!

Posted on December 20, 2010 by attraversiamodarmaz

This is good stuff, so lean in close, and you might want to bookmark this one for future reference.
I feel really brilliant today.
I might just have a parade in my honor…no kidding.
I had an idea…
and I tried it today…
and it worked!!!
Amidst kind of a shitty day otherwise even…well, you know – me and my silver lining love to laugh nature try to make the best of everything but still…rough day and STILL my idea worked!
It is MC.
You remember, the greatest and most tenacious teacher I will ever have??
Well, he’s pretty tough when you (or me) and he don’t quite see eye to eye.
He and I have been giving one another the blues lately.
I was rather tired of it.
It just so happened that some of the teachers I work with were feeling rather blue too.
So, I directed them to http://www.wholebrainteaching.com.
I told them plain and simple when the work is hard, you simply HAVE to make some fun…HAVE TO.
My teaching hat is often put away at home (not really, but I am not overtly in action)
Only, for some reason this one little idea from the great website mentioned above stuck with me right when I needed it most.
MC is very…VERY competitive.
There is this strategy for class cooperation where there is this scoreboard for the classroom.
When things are going well (and of course you do a lot of positive reinforcement) the class gets a point.
When there is a problem, the teacher gets a point.
Last night when I was totally over it I started rambling to MC in the midst of his Sassy McSasspants routine…
I said, “that’s it. I’m gonna start keepin score mister. Sassy mouth, tally mark. Nice mouth, tally mark.”
I was spewing nonsense, only somewhere in the midst of it my brain clicked in gear and I remembered the game.
Dare I hope it might work for mamas too???
So I shifted and told him we would play a game and just see who might win.
I told him he better get a good night’s sleep because I LOVE to win (I could care less about winning, but he had to feel a competitor or it might not work!)
This morning of course I forgot at first (before coffee), but about the first time he started in I remembered!
I just said, “DUDE – that’s a point for mama!!!”.
He was worried that I was remembering and not writing it down(he is smart).
He got the paper and told me to set it up.
The cool thing was that he didn’t argue about the point, or the redirection for that matter, he smiled and laughed and so did I.
I knew I was on to something.
He got a point everytime he did just what he was asked and talked in a nice way.
I got a point for everything that WASN’T that.
He showed me the power of our back and forth when he did something and I got really exasperated and said his name in an exasperated way.
He just looked at me and smiled and said, “I think I just got a point!”
Now we had’t talked about HIM getting points if I was grouchy, but he had me, so I said ok with a frowny face because he loved it all the more!
Ladies and Gentlemen, I don’t know the score, but I do know that bedtime was more responsive than EVER, AND I do know that he had a really great day and so did I.
He didn’t even ask what happens when you win.
He’s pretty smart.
He probably already figured out we won…laughing and tally marking our way through a kind of rough Sunday.
(ps if you are going to try this…it will only work if you play this game with love in your heart and a smile on your face)

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Please.

Posted on December 3, 2010 by attraversiamodarmaz

Your presence is not welcome.
Tis the season, you know?
I have things to do.
We have places to go.
Every time I turn around, there you are…you and your gift.
I did not ask for this.
In fact, I said no thank you, or I would have…had you bothered to ask.
You were rough in your delivery.
Hence the mess.
Nice.
Do you really think…
I will encourage this trespass?
This token of your affection?
This nasty dead mouse
on my driveway??

I see the cheshire grin, mister neighborhood cat.

So be it.

I have a lovely grin of my own…as I let loose my dogs.

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