My body is a protective capsule for my amazing spirit.
“Wake me when there’s been a revolution in your heart.”
I have a t shirt with that lovely phrase and I just adore it. What I was reminded of at the birthday dinner was how in need I am of the revolution so I can properly support and nourish myself and all the women in my life. Men are not excluded, I just don’t see as many self harming habits.
At dinner my niece was sitting across from me. I believe she just turned 15. She was not excited about ordering dinner and her mom encouraged some vegetables as moms often do. Her dad asked that they not have that battle at the birthday dinner and the short, quiet conversation was over.  A bit later her mom (who is a slim, healthy, attractive, and stylish woman) asked me to please convince her daughter that she IS NOT fat!  I knew that the words would mean little or nothing so I tried a different route.  I just talked about looking over my high school photo when I was last home.  I compared the photo to the one next to it where I was in my first or second year of college.  The weight was about the same, but my face was much more angular (read THIN).  My bones and structure were not done growing and changing.  My niece is beautiful and perfect.  She’s considering being a vegan.  She’s all about animal rights and antsy for a cause, which I think is wonderful.  Great direction to pour energy as opposed to obsessing about a body in a mirror or looking at airbrushed images and figuring out how to get there.  Or looking at others in the hallway or out and about with different genes and wondering why you’re not built like that…what???  How could you be built like that with differing genes all together???

When I worked the door at wrestling meets (meets?matches?? whatever) at the middle school I worked at I was really enlightened.  It was such a perfect example of child development physically demonstrated.  Here were a whole slew of seventh and eighth graders all within a year or so of one another and the physical size and muscle development was all over the place.  How awful that we’re given this idea that we should long for what we see when what we have been given is exactly what we need. 

My own daughter is beautiful and perfect and already she is talking about fat thighs!!!  I tell you she doesn’t hear that at home from her mama!  I may think it when I look in the mirror, but I am really concerned about projecting or her absorbing, so I just try to be really positive.  It’s clearly not enough.  If I want her to feel beautiful, then I need to look at myself in the mirror and do the same.  Oh, if only we could fake it and do right by our babies…

Last year when she was in first grade she was getting ready for school and told me that she was wearing this shirt because so and so liked it and told her to wear it.  WHAT????  I might have freaked out a little bit about wearing whatever the hell you want or maybe letting so and so borrow it and wear it himself!  I’m glad so and so moved away and goes to a different school and my angel CNN now loves an adorable adoring friend who thinks my daughter is absolutely perfect in every way:)

Here’s a random thought loosely connected…a truth I just love that I found when it surfaced in my brain…I was talking with my friend I’ve known since kindergarten…don’t even remember what she was talking about, but she smiled and I noticed the crinkles at the corner of her eyes and thought, “well jeesh – she’s always been pretty, but her crinkles make her even prettier!”.  TRUE STORY.  Then when I went home I noticed my own crinkles and you know what?  I thought I looked a bit prettier too!  I LOVE EYE CRINKLES!

have a beautiful 2009 awake and present for every moment of bliss –

my mantra – my body is a protective capsule for my amazing spirit…

ciao belles